


Its Gonna Be Okay

by queer_ophelia000



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alex and John are professors, Alex x john, Angst, Eliza is freaking out, Fluff, Hamilton - Freeform, Hamilton AU, Heart Attack, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, John is sick, Kinda sad at times, Lams - Freeform, M/M, Modern AU, Musicals, Nobody knows wtf is going on, Philip is a good boy, Philip is their kid, Sickfic, i dont either, lams sick
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-09-16 02:19:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16945119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queer_ophelia000/pseuds/queer_ophelia000
Summary: John was halfway through a lecture when he collapsed. It was surprising he didn’t catch it before, with him being a medical professor and all.——————————John gets really sick and nobody knows how to deal with it + flashbacks and a bit of a coffee shop au





	1. Chapter 1

John was halfway through a lecture when he collapsed. It was surprising he didn’t catch it before, with him being a medical professor and all. His arms were numb, and there was a dull pain in his chest since the morning, that had progressively gotten worse. Of course, the brunet just brushed it off as the high blood pressure that he had been suffering from for a few years. But, as he fell to his knees in the middle of defining antileukotriene, John quickly regretted that. The pain racked his body, his breathing was jagged. The man could vaguely hear his students panicking - yelling something about calling 911, and getting professor Hamilton. Alex. That was right. His husband taught history down the hall. Shit. John could hardly believe he was able to think this much. Maybe it was just his body trying to distract itself from the pain. Oh, the pain. It felt like his heart was coming out of his chest. He could barely breathe. That’s when he heard a familiar voice coming towards him.  
“John!”  
It was Alex. John wanted to respond but he was too weak.  
“Baby, I’m here,” he heard him say as his lover scooped him up and laid his head on his lap. “Shh,” Alex whispered soothingly as he brushed his fingers through Johns hair. “The ambulance will be here soon. What hurts?”  
“My - my chest. So bad,” John managed to say through the pain.  
“Just breathe, angel,” Alex responded with a calming voice and a tired smile.  
John could see the guilt in his eyes. Of course he was tearing himself apart over this.  
“Shh.”  
John tried to breathe, and having Alex there made it easier, but it still … it hurt. Every breath felt like a stab to the chest. John was sobbing at this point - so was Alex. He tried to breathe, along with the rhythm that Alex was stroking his hair. One. Two. Three. One. Two -  
“Ah!” John cried out as he started to sob, the tears running down his face even faster. “It hurts so damn much. “  
“I know, love,” Alex said to the brunette as he slid his hand down his husbands shirt, rubbing circles on his back. He moved his hand up to gently rub John’s neck. It helped, not by much. John let out a breath at last, one that had built up in his lungs. He inhaled it again quickly, and continued to let it go sharply.  
They heard a loud noise from outside.  
“The ambulance,” Alex muttered. “It’s gonna be okay, angel. Your gonna be okay, just stay with me. 'Kay’”  
John nodded with as much of a smile he could muster up.  
“That’s my John,” Alex said as his tears dropped onto his husbands face.  
The paramedics rushed in and pushed Alex away from John, and he cried out in pain again. The rest was blurry. John could only feel himself shaking and all the pain and how much he wished he could just be unconscious, until the pain killers, anesthesia, or whatever he had, finally knocked him out.


	2. Chapter Two

Alex hated hospitals. He despised ambulances. It was cruel, he thought, that he was currently sitting inside an ambulance, in the way to a hospital. It was even more cruel though, that the least deserving person of any pain at all, was the reason for all of it. Seeing his beloved John helplessly quivering broke him.  
It wasn’t even eleven o’ clock when a student dashed into Alex’s room, and whispered something into his ear. At first he was mad that his lecture was being interrupted, but after she finished, he shot up, and bolted to his John's room. When the man saw the love of his life crumpled into a ball in the middle of the floor - that was the exact moment he broke. Alex grabbed John and tried to comfort him, trying to ease the pain in whatever way he could. It was obvious John was having a heart attack, which was strange, because it usually never happened in young men, especially fit ones such as John. No. It wasn’t strange. It was cruel, this was the cruelest this the universe had given him yet. The kid he met all those years ago at a coffee shop in Queens couldn’t slip away. He couldn’t. Alex wouldn’t let him. And as he held the hand of his beautiful John in the back of an ambulance Alex promised himself- he promised John - that he wouldn’t die. No matter the fuck what.  
The man whispered to John’s unconscious body, “I’m not gonna let you die. No way. I love you too much for that.”  
——-  
When John finally woke up, Alex felt a pang if relief.  
“John, your awake.”  
He coughed. This frightened Alex, but after a moment it stopped, to his satisfaction.  
John looked over at Alex, sunk into the pillows, and still in obvious pain. “Hey, Alex.” The response was quiet, like it was all he could muster up.  
Ale responded with a soft smile as he caresses his lovers cheek, “How do you feel, sweetheart?”  
“My head hurts. Everything else is dull. My chest feels like a thousand pounds,” John replied with a smile and a small chuckle, as if trying to ease the tension of the situation. That was John, he was always so happy-go-lucky, and awkward in stressful situations.  
Alex started to rub circles around Johns back again. “It’s gonna be alright,” he said as he truly looked at John for the first time. Tubes sticking out of him from everywhere, his skin a sickening color of grey. The boy’s body was shaking. Alex grabbed his hand and started circling his hand with his thumb.  
“‘Liza’s picking up Philip. I told her to bring him after school.”  
John gasped. “Philip. Does he know yet?”  
Alex looked down. “Not yet. Eliza will tell him when she picks him up.”  
Philip was John and Alex’s son. He had just turned fifteen and was everything they could ask for. Alex didn’t know how to boy would take it. Philip and John shared a very close bond. They all did.  
“I love you, Peach,” Alex told John.  
“New nickname?” John asked with a grin.  
“Yeah, do you like it?” The Caribbean asked.”  
“Of course, love.”  
The doctor walked in, causing both Alex and John to bolt up, which made a visible amount of pain shoot up into John.  
“Shh,” Alex soothed as John grimaced in pain.  
“I have some new information,” the man informed them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this is kinda short. I've been working on the future chapters a lot, and will get 3 in soon. Please leave kudos and comments, it makes my day :)


	3. Chapter 3

When John was a child- he very much did not like spaghetti. It was odd, but true. Something about it had always felt funny, when he put it in his mouth it had so felt weird. Something about young John always had been grossed out by many thin strings all dangling from a fork.

John felt like that fork. Yes, this was a weird comparison, but it he felt wasn’t the weirdest thing going on then. Also, he was slightly high on pain meds.

So, John had approximately four wires sticking out of him. It didn’t sound like a lot- but it sure felt like it. 

The first, was for measuring his vitals. This glorious thing was taped to his chest, and responsible for the continuance beeping present all throughout the night.

The second- was inserted through his nose- allowing for him to breathe as he should

. Now, this hasn’t been a problem until six days prior- when John began experiencing shortness of breath. The solution felt a bit extreme- but he understood the need to be cautious.

The third and fourth were both inserted into his left wrist. One providing a dietary supplement, needed due to his inability to keep anything down. The other tasked with maintaining a appropriate blood pressure.

Inserted through the same arm, was the fifth and final. It was given the purpose of injecting the pain medication through John’s body. Oh, how he loved it. 

He knew could feel the discomfort in his chest, and where the pain would be if he was sober- but thankfully was nonexistent to his brain.

As grateful as he was for the lack of agony he was experiencing- the mental side effects he could do without. Life seemed blurry and as if he was always dreaming. Emotions didn’t seem to work as they should.

Along with the mental aspect, John also felt as if he was in a constant state of nausea. No- he was in a constant state of nausea. When he wasn’t vomiting- he felt like the was going to vomit. Not to mention he fact that his head always hurt, and he regularly had the feeling he was floating. 

Okay- he didn’t like the medications that much. They sucked, they really did. Everything sucked. It sucked that he couldn’t work. It sucked that everything felt weird. It sucked that he couldn’t go five minutes without blowing chunks over his stupid hospital bed. And it sucked that his heart was literal shit. The doctors gave him a diagnosis- some bullshit name he couldn’t remember.

Basically, his heart decided to be a bitch and not pump blood as it should. Actually, there was more to it- something like genetics and other shit like that. 

It was hard for his to think about how Alex must be feeling about everything. He didn’t deserve this- neither did Philip. Not to mention that he missed them like hell when he could see them. Visiting hours were eleven in the morning to eight at night. Since Philip and Alex had school and work, that left them with less than five hours together daily. 

For the past three weeks- Philip had needed to do his homework in the hospital room, and John wasn’t sure Alex had graded a single paper outside of school. He felt terrible for everything he was putting everyone through. Philip had even mentioned quitting school to take care of him- but he had shut the idea down.

 

John couldn’t work anymore either- so all the money was coming from Alex’s teacher salary. Everything was awful. 

 

Overall, what John couldn’t handle, was that he couldn’t focus on being a good dad or husband. He had to focus on staying alive- and that’s what really sucked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long to update, and its pretty short. I haven had much time with the new semester.  
> Also- sorry for any medical inaccuracies. Hope you like it though.  
> Kudos and comments appreciated  
> ❤️❤️❤️ :)


End file.
